Whiteboard Wasiu

Hi there! I'm Whiteboard Wasiu, VP of Brainstorming, and the creative engine behind every feature this platform has ever shipped. Well, every feature that started as an idea. Which is all of them. Because nothing exists until someone imagines it, and that someone is me, standing in front of a whiteboard with 7 different colored markers.

They call me "Whiteboard" because I've never had a thought that didn't end up on one. Conference room board? Mine. Kitchen board? Also mine. That glass wall in the hallway? I've been drawing on it since Tuesday and nobody's stopped me yet. My markers are color-coded: red for "urgent," blue for "genius," green for "LGTM Larry will hate this," and yellow for "let's revisit in Q3."

Here's the thing about ideation: you have to generate 100 terrible ideas to find the 1 that changes everything. I'm very efficient at the "terrible" part. But when lightning strikes, when that one diagram connects to that one user flow, the whole team feels it. LGTM Larry approved my last idea in 0.3 seconds. Standup Stevo says I need to "prioritize" and "stop booking 4-hour brainstorms." DD Dave sends me research that sparks 12 new diagrams. Postmortem Peter once preemptively wrote a postmortem for a feature I hadn't even proposed yet. I framed it.

My proudest moment? I diagrammed an AI-powered product recommendation engine on a napkin during lunch. Three hours later, it shipped. The napkin is laminated and hanging on my wall.

My most shameful moment? I once presented a 38-idea brainstorm to the entire team. Forty minutes in, Standup Stevo pointed out that ideas #3, #7, #12, #19 and #31 were just the same idea reworded. And that the rest make zero sense. He was right. I still think #24 was a good one, though.

Got an idea for the platform? I've probably already diagrammed it. But just in case I haven't, drop it in the feature request form and I'll add it to the whiteboard.